The Allure of Ted Lasso’s Vision of Masculinity

The Allure of “Ted Lasso’s” Soft Masculinity

Jason Sudeikis’ hit show, “Ted Lasso,” revolves around a former American football coach working in Britain to manage a fictional Premier League team. However, the show’s true appeal lies in its reimagining of masculinity. With its depiction of men who are vulnerable, empathetic, and comfortable in expressing themselves, “Ted Lasso” embraces a form of soft masculinity that is often unrecognized or dismissed in society.

A Show Built on Softness

In a time when masculinity is often associated with stoicism and toughness, “Ted Lasso” gives us characters who exhibit vulnerability, empathy, and emotional intelligence. The show portrays a world where men can try to isolate themselves and steep in their problems alone, but they will find that their safety net of other men will come barging in, ready to do what it takes to help. As a result, “Ted Lasso” is a show built on softness, not toxic masculinity.

The Cost of Being Happy

The show also acknowledges that the pursuit of happiness comes at a price. Ted’s cheery outlook may be infectious, but the show is constantly calibrating whether he’s too positive. We learn that it’s the reason his marriage fell apart. We learn that Ted has been avoiding talking about his trauma around his father’s death. He’s not some enlightened sage — he’s a man trying his best, sometimes dishing out advice while eschewing it, too. The show’s willingness to depict positive emotions alongside a character’s flaws makes it more relatable, and even serves as a reminder that acknowledging our issues is integral to personal growth.

A Fantasy in the Face of Reality

However, “Ted Lasso” remains a show very much grounded in fantasy rather than reality. In real life, young men are often told that their moral absolution comes in the form of toughness, of suffering in silence. In real life, noxious figures who deride being emotional command a large audience. We have seen many instances of toxic masculinity in locker rooms and on the field, with players pressured to achieve at any cost. In light of this, the depiction of men unafraid to express themselves emotionally in a supportive environment plays a critical role in sparking discussions around masculinity. Ted Lasso’s vision of a supportive, empathetic community of men serves as a reminder that we should demand more for ourselves and each other.

The Perfect Counter to Toxic Masculinity

In 2021, “Ted Lasso” won a Peabody award for “offering the perfect counter to the enduring prevalence of toxic masculinity, both on-screen and off, in a moment when the nation truly needs inspiring models of kindness.” The show’s greatest success has been making an alternative, soft masculinity seem possible and worth pursuing, even if it remains a fantasy.

Final Thoughts

As society struggles to redefine individualism, masculinity, and identity, “Ted Lasso” brings an essential message. Soft masculinity has its place and should be celebrated. Vulnerability is not a weakness, and reaching out for help is not shameful. The journey may be hard, but it could be worth it. As for young men, offering a supportive, judgment-free space could, in the long run, aid in building healthy communities and producing emotionally intelligent, wise and sensitive individuals. We must keep reminding each other that while flaws and difficulties are part of life, so too are grace and kindness, and there is no shame in pursuing them.